Why Weren't You There?
by White Rose of Wutai
Summary: Remus Lupin and Severus Snape have formed an unlikely bond, but can they stay together whilst those close to them try to keep them apart? Slash - Snape/Lupin
1. Turn A Blind Eye

Why weren't you there?

Snape/Lupin

Chapter one- Turn a blind eye.

"Oi, Snivellus, how'd you like me to turn you into a flobberworm?"

Severus Snape walked on, keeping his head down, eyes fixed on the uneven pave-stones beneath his feet.

"Snivellus! Prongs just asked you a question, I suggest you answer it."

Snape continued walking, praying silently that for once, just once, they'd let it go. Maybe this time Potter's cronies would let him cross the courtyard without hexing him.

"_Levicorpus!"_

Snape felt his legs fly out from under him as he was jerked upside-down, his head narrowly missing the floor. Perhaps not...

"Potter! _Stupe..."_

"_Expelliarmus!"_ Yelled Sirius

Snape's wand flew out of his hand before he had chance to complete the hex, and fell onto the hard stone floor. A shower of blue sparks erupted from the tip.

"Wormtail. Pick it up." Ordered James, and Peter Pettigrew hurriedly scrambled across the stones and grabbed the fallen wand.

"At least" thought Snape as he hovered upside-down in midair with his robes covering his chin and nose "at least I've got trousers on this time" He shot a pleading look at the quiet boy standing behind Sirius Black, begging with his eyes for him to do something. Sirius saw the look and frowned, turning to the boy behind him.

"Hey Moony, why is Snivelly looking at you like that?"

Remus Lupin tore his eyes away from Snape's, and gave Sirius a bored look.

"Dunno mate, maybe he expects me to help him." He replied, looking disinterested.

"Yeah, maybe he thinks you _care_ about him."

"Maybe he wants you to be his _friend_!" squealed Wormtail.

"No, I've got it" A spiteful look came into James Potter's eyes "He wants you to be his _Boyfriend!_"

Sirius let out a bark of laughter, and Wormtail erupted into a fit of giggles, and fell to the floor. Lupin gasped in shock, but quickly covered up his surprise with a splutter of laughter. Snape looked horrified, and shot a hurt look at Lupin, who was still laughing with Sirius. Lupin returned his gaze, silently apologising, and hoping that Snape would understand.

***

"But _why!" _Yelled Snape. "Whywon't you _do_ anything about it? You always come to me afterwards, apologising, pleading, kissing, but you never _do_ anything to help when it's happening! Sometimes I doubt that you care about me at all!" Snape turned away.

"That's not true! Of course I care Sev, it's just that…oh, you _know _what Sirius would say!"replied Lupin, grabbing Snape's hand and pulling him back.

"_Bollocks!" _spat Snape "Bollocks to what Black says, and Potter too! Remus, I don't get how you can hang around with them!"

"They're my friends, Sev!" Cried Lupin

"Some friends!" Snape shouted back "You can't even tell them you're gay! Remus, you're not supposed to be scared of your friends. And friends don't try to kill your boyfriend!"

Lupin looked at the enraged boy in front of him, suddenly furious.

"Now that's not Fair Severus! You know that was a mistake, Sirius never intended to try to kill you."

"But he almost did, whether he meant to or not. And I hate owing my life to Potter! I would rather have _died!"_

Snape stepped towards Lupin, fists tightly clenched. He stared into the other boy's eyes.

"You don't mean that." Said Lupin, looking away.

Snape sighed, and relaxed his hands. "No. You're right, I don't. I wish _He_ had died. And Black too." He grabbed Lupin's shoulders "Because then, you wouldn't need to be afraid. Neither of us would."

Lupin gasped, and Snape realized he had been squeezing his shoulders harder then he intended. He relaxed his grip, and pulled his lover into a hug.

"I'm sorry" he said tenderly "I'm just frustrated with Black and Potter, and I'm taking it out on you."

Lupin kissed Snape on the cheek. "I don't want to loose you." He whispered.

In the shadows, just behind Remus Lupin, a small brown rat scampered off to report his discovery to his two friends, waiting for him in the Gryffindor common room.

***

_I may continue this, I may not. Depends on how long my inspiration stays around for. It eats reviews (Hint hint =p) and doesn't mind __**constructive **__criticism. _


	2. Confrontations and lies

_Hi Guy's! Thank you to all who took the time to review, I hope you like chapter two! Hey that rhymes! Maybe I should get a career in poetry, what do you think? ;) Anyway; on to the next chapter..._

Chapter two- Confrontations and lies.

It was late by the time Remus snuck back into the Gryffindor common room. The Fat Lady had not been at all happy at being woken up, and had made him stand outside until she felt he was truly sorry, so he was cold, tired, his feet hurt, and he just wanted to crawl into bed. He thought of Severus, and what had happened after the row, and a small smile played upon his lips. Just as he reached the bottom of the stairs to the boy's dormitory, he heard the roar of the fire, suddenly coming to life in the fireplace. Sighing, he turned round, thinking a house elf had started it after sensing his presence in the common room. He made his way over to the fire, and put it out.

"You're back then"

Lupin jumped, knocking over the bucket of wood that was left by the fireplace, causing the fire to relight.

"James! You scared me! What are you doing up?"

"We could ask you the same question." Said Sirius, appearing seemingly out of nowhere.

"But there would be no point, because we already know." Added James.

James sat down, and motioned to Lupin and Sirius to do the same.

"What's all this about, James?" Asked Remus, his heart pounding. "What ever it is, can we do it tomorrow? I'm really tired."

"I bet you are!" exclaimed Peter Pettigrew throwing off the invisibility cloak they had all been hiding under when Remus walked in. "Yes, I would be too, if I had been doing what you have been doing!"

Lupin thought for a moment, trying to work out what Peter had just said. Then he went pale.

"Wha... what are you talking about Wormtail? I couldn't sleep, so I went for a walk, that's all."

Sirius let forward. "Is it? Is it really? I don't think so. Because if you just went for a walk, then _why so pale?"_

"I... err... it's... It's a full moon coming up. Come on guys, you know how it is."

"No it isn't" said Wormtail. "It was a full moon two weeks ago. You're lying.'

"What _I _think," said James, who had been unusually quiet up until now, "Is that you were meeting somebody. A lover, perhaps. A certain _Slytherin _perhaps."

Lupin gasped, his face completely white. "How did you find out?" he asked weakly.

"A little rat told us." Said Sirius, glancing at Wormtail.

Suddenly, Lupin was on his feet, enraged.

"You had Wormtail _spy _on me!" he yelled.

Peter shrank back, and looked ashamed.

Sirius shrugged "we did what we had to. We were worried about you Moony, you were always sneaking off, being secretive, not telling anyone where you were going. We had to find out."

James looked at the teenage werewolf, with a cross between anger and betrayal in his eyes.

"So," he finally said, "when were you going to tell us you are sleeping with Snivellus?"

Lupin looked away.

"I...I wasn't," he replied, "I thought you might hate me, y'know, for being gay."

"Gay." Said James coldly. "Gay. We don't have a problem with you being _gay_; we've known _that_ for ages!"

Lupin was taken aback

"What?" he said "how did you...?"

"The thing we have a problem with," James interrupted, "is that you're fucking _Severus Bloody Snape!"_

"I mean," James continued "you could have had any gay or bisexual guy in the school, you could have had Sirius for god's sake, and you chose _Snape! _You know how much we despise him. Why did you choose Snivellus?"

"Don't call him that." Lupin muttered "and," he continued hurriedly, seeing that James was about to explode again. "I'm not just 'fucking' him. Yes, if you must know, we have sex," He blushed "but I love him. And he feels the same."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "You are so _naive _Moony! Snape doesn't love you! He is obviously using you to get at us."

Peter nodded his head furiously; eager to get his friend to see sense, so they could all go to bed.

"Personally," he thought, "I don't really care who Moony dates, as long as we are all friends."

But, of course he wouldn't dare say this aloud, for fear of angering Sirius. Not that Sirius needed any help with that at the moment.

"I mean," Continued Sirius, "come on, this is Snape the wannabe Deatheater were talking about, and I highly doubt he would even know what love is!"

"It's not like that Padfoot; Sev doesn't want to be a Deatheater. It's his Slytherin friends that are into all that dark-art stuff. He just tags along."

"_Sev_," sputtered James "You call him _Sev_! Moony, just how long has this been going on?"

"_About a year_" thought Remus "Only a couple of weeks, but I know how we feel about each other." He said.

Something, he didn't know what, but something had told him that telling the marauders the truth was a bad idea.

Sirius had been staring, almost absentmindedly, into the fire while James had been speaking. He looked up.

"End it." He said abruptly.

Both Peter and Remus were taken aback. James on the other hand, nodded in approval.

Lupin sat down, stunned into silence. Peter leaned towards Sirius "that wasn't the plan," he hissed in his ear, "We were only going to talk to him about it!"

"I know," said Sirius calmly, "But I want him to end it. For his own good. He can do a lot better then Snape."

His eyes met with James's, and a gleam of understanding passed between them. Peter's eyes widened as he caught on. Only Remus remained oblivious. James stood up.

"Its late," he said, "we should all go to bed. Moony, you can tell Snape tomorrow that you don't want to sleep with him any more." He nodded at Lupin, and then at Sirius. "Come on Padfoot, we need to talk."

***

Lying in bed, Remus could hear his friends whispering. He wasn't listening -God damn it, he had had enough of listening to them that night- but he couldn't help over hearing some of what they were saying. He heard his own name, and Snape's. Crush was mentioned a few times, there was a cry of "Oh, _Sirius_" from Peter, and some sniffing. Not enough to understand what the convocation was about, but enough to know that they were talking about him. And that one of them was crying.

***

_So, did you enjoy it? My inspiration is a bit hungry at the moment, but the next chapter is half written, so it shouldn't be _too _long until I post it. (Unless I forget, which isn't uncommon.) ;) See ya at the beginning of chapter three!_


	3. Love and Leave

_Hiya! So, back for more are you? Want to know what happens next do you? Well, what are you wasting time talking to me for? The story is below. :)_

_Enjoy!_

Chapter three – Love and Leave.

Remus lay still on the bed, running his fingers –almost absentmindedly- threw the other boys (slightly damp and greasy) hair. It had been three days since the confrontation with the other Marauders in the common room, and he still hadn't plucked up the courage to talk to Snape about it.

Snape himself, his head on Remus's chest, was half-asleep, listening to the rhythmic beating of his lover's heart.

Remus sighed heavily. Severus lifted his head slightly, and smiled.

"Was that a sigh of pleasure or regret?"

Lupin sat up, contemplating telling Snape what James and Sirius had said. He thought better of it, and returned the smile. "Both," he answered. "Pleasure at being with you, and regret that now I must leave."

He gently lifted Snape's head off of his chest, and kissed the end of his nose. He stretched his stiff arms, and got up.

Snape lay there for a second, then sighed and got out of bed.

"Sometimes I think you just want me for sex." He joked, picking up a pair of black boxers and slipping them on.

"Damn right I do." Replied Lupin, turning to flash a smile at the other boy. "D'you know what I did with my clothes?"

"Your shoes are over by the door with your socks tucked into them, your pants and trousers are at the end of the bed, your robes are on the floor here, and I think Potters invisibility cloak is over there." Snape replied, pointing to a pile of trunks in the corner of the Slytherin dormitory. "Even in a fit of passion you are so damn tidy!"

Remus hurriedly pulled on his clothes and found the cloak.

"Got it! Sorry Sev, but I have to go. Hopefully Prongs won't have noticed that the cloaks gone yet."

Snape rolled his eyes.

"Prongs! Honestly Reemy, why on earth do you call each other such silly nick-names?"

Remus opened his mouth to answer, but Snape interrupted.

"Yes, yes, the animagus thing, but... oh, never mind."

He walked over to Lupin and kissed him passionately.

"Our usual place tonight?" he said.

"I'll be there." Lupin promised, pulling on the cloak and disappearing.

Snape felt him nibble his ear.

"I love you." He said, not knowing if Lupin was still there or not.

"I love you too." came back Remus's disembodied voice.

He wanted to stay, but he could already hear the other Slytherins returning from the great hall. He quietly slipped through the door.

***

James was standing outside the Slytherin common room. Remus almost ran straight into him, but he managed to stop in time. He hesitated, wondering how he was going to explain why he had been in the Slytherin common room. He was just about to speak, when he remembered that he was wearing the cloak, and therefore, James couldn't actually see him. He wondered how his friend had known where he was. Remus knew that James could not have followed him. Not unless he had suddenly developed the ability to see through the cloak, which was, Remus thought to himself, highly unlikely. Not to mention the fact that it had been 5 in the morning when he had snuck out of Gryffindor Tower and that James had never been known to wake up before at least 7.

"Strange." Muttered Remus, forgetting that invisibility cloaks don't mask sound.

James jumped.

"Who's there?" He said sharply, "Peeves?"

Remus smiled. So James didn't know he had the cloak. That would make things a lot easier. He quietly walked down the damp corridor, chuckling at James, who was spinning around on the spot looking for the poltergeist.

***

_Sorry this chapter took so long to post, my inspiration went on holiday =)_

_It's back now though, so no worries!_

_Any way, feel free to tell me what you think, as all reviews are appreciated._

_Thanks, until chapter four, which is called 'Lies' by the way. Just thought I'd give you a hint there ;) _


	4. Lies

_Hello again! As I said, this is 'Lies'. Hope you like it, and please leave a review =)_

Chapter four - Lies

Back in Gryffindor Tower, Remus hurriedly stuffed the cloak back under James's bed, and ran down to the Great Hall. Sirius was there, in his usual place, with Peter to the right of him. James hadn't got back yet. That was good, now Remus didn't have to come up with a story for him, he could simply say he woke up late. Peter would believe him, and Sirius wasn't the cleverest person in the mornings. Sure enough, Remus noticed as he was about to sit down next to Peter, Sirius was attempting to eat his scrambled egg with the wrong end of the fork. He had also put his elbow in a pot of jam, and had poured apple juice on his cereal.

"Not to worry though" thought Remus, "he'd wake up about lunchtime. After blowing up a few cauldrons in potions. And probably falling asleep in charms. Again."

"Morning Moony." Said Peter cheerfully. "Sleep in late again?"

"Yeah," Remus replied, "Sorry about that. I must get myself a new alarm Toad. I think I ate mine last full moon." He smiled at Peter, who wasn't quite sure weather or not he was joking.

He finally decided that he was telling the truth, and smiled nervously at his friend. Remus frowned. He had thought that Peter didn't mind him being a ware-wolf.

"Well, you can get a new one tomorrow, when we go to Hogsmeade. I need a new rememberall anyway, and I'm fed up of Padfoot drawing all over my copy of _Fantastic Beasts and Where to find them_, so I'll get one of them too."

Sirius looked up

"Someone say m'name?" he slurred

"No," said Remus, smirking at Wormtail. "You go back to sleep Sirius."

Sirius grunted, and went back to attempting to eat his cereal with a knife.

Remus shook his head, and turned to continue his convosation with Wormtail. Wormtail, however, was frowning at his timetable. He turned it upside down, hoping that it would make more sense that way. It didn't.

After about a minute of this, finally gave up, and handed it to Remus.

"Moony, can you see what's wrong with it? Its telling me we have potions first on a Wednesday, but I thought we have care of magical creatures."

Remus rolled his eyes at his friend and chuckled.

"Yes, Wormtail, we Gryffindors have Care of magical creatures, but Carol Geoffrey of Hufflepuff has Potions. How'd you manage to mix up your timetables? I didn't think you even knew each other."

Wormtail turned bright pink and stared at his toast.

"Wormy? Don't tell me you and Geoffrey..?"

"Don't tell James!" Begged Wormtail. "You know what he's like; he'll somehow try to use Carol to get to Lily Evans."

Remus frowned down at Wormtail, who was clasping his hands together as if praying to him.

"What?" said Remus, his tone hard, "Like you didn't rat on me you mean?"

Wormtail had the grace to look ashamed.

"I didn't want to do it, believe me. I don't care who you're going out with." He paused. "They made me. You know what James is like."

Remus smiled grimly; yes, he did know what James was like, and he also had the feeling that had he, Remus, been in Wormtail's position, he would have done the same thing. He did not like that feeling.

"Okay, Wormy. I won't tell James, if you stop spying on me. If they ask you to again, lie, and say I was in the library or something. Say I was crying if you want, but don't tell them I was with Snape. Deal?"

Wormtail's eyes widened.

"You're still with Snape? Even after what James and Sirius said?"

Remus silently cursed to himself. He hadn't meant to let that slip, no matter how much he trusted Wormtail.

"Never mind that, do we have a deal?"

Wormtail nodded enthusiastically.

"Don't worry you can count on me!"

Remus breathed a sigh of relief and smiled at his friend.

"Good, now that that's dealt with, we can go to lessons. C'mon, Lets get to Care of magical creatures. I think my flobberworm needs feeding again."

"Mine died last week," Said Wormtail gloomily "Prongs fed it some kind of Muggle firework and it exploded."

"I think Lily's one had babies yesterday, so you can ask to borrow one of them. She likes you."

"And doesn't Prongs know it" grimaced Wormtail.

"Well, as long as you don't play up to it, you should be safe," replied Remus, making his way out of the Great Hall. "Race ya!"

They sped off down the corridor, stopping only to apologise to a second year they knocked down whist turning a corner.

But, whilst Remus and Wormtail could depend on each other not to give away their secrets, there was one person that had overheard the whispered convosation that had not be sworn to silence;

They had forgotten about Sirius.

****

_Okay guys, how'd you like it? Reviews are welcome. _

_BTW, I probably won't be posting for a while, what with exams and all. You know how it is. I might do a couple of one-shots, but nothing too strenuous. I need to conserve my brain power for __revision __and __exams __and __coursework!__ *groan* I know, my life is amazing, am I right? _


	5. Seed of Doubt

_Right, now this chapter takes place __during __chapter Four, okay? After Lupin leaves Slytherin common room and bumps into James, and whilst Wormy and Lupin are having that talk in the hall. Right, everyone happy? Great, now that that's sorted, On With The Fic!_

Chapter five – Seed of doubt__

Severus watched as the door of the Slytherin boy's dormitory closed, seemingly of its own accord. He stood there for a moment, just staring at the door, and then sighed. He had half hoped that his lover would come bursting back in declaring that he could not bear to leave him and sod the consequences. He had even imagined how he might respond to such a fit of passion, when he remembered that A: his lover was shy, polite Remus Lupin, and B: it was 9:00 and the other Slytherins would be back any minute and it would be extremely foolish of said lover to return to Snape's bed at such a time.  
A loud rumble in his stomach reminded Severus that he had not eaten yet, and that if he didn't hurry, the house-elves would clear up all the food before he had a chance to. Just as he was getting hurriedly dressed, a group of boys burst through the door, looking extremely excited.  
"Snape," Barked one "there's a Gryffindor standing outside the common room, one of the ones Black hangs around with, demanding to see you."  
"Want us to get rid of him? My brother taught me a new curse the other day, and I've been dying for a chance to try it out on Gryffindor scum!" Said another, eagerly drawing his wand.  
Snape's heart leapt. Surly Remus can't be _that_ stupid! Unless something happened, and he needs help.  
"No thanks Mulciber, I'm sure I can more than handle him. Which one is it?"  
"I dunno. How am I meant to know their names?"  
Snape rolled his eyes.  
"As helpful as ever I see. Never mind. I'm sure I'll figure it out when I get there."  
Mulciber looked surprised.  
"You're actually going to talk to a _Gryffindor!_"  
"One of Sirius _Blacks_ lot!" added in a smaller boy, Avery.  
Snape's lip curled into his signature grimace.  
"I heard you the first time Avery. I, unlike you, am not a simpleton. Now get out of my way. I have scum to curse."

****

"What do you want Lupin?" Spat Snape as he climbed out of the portrait. "I, unlike some, am extremely busy, so make it quick."  
It was only then that he looked up to make eye contact with the Gryffindor. The eyes he met with, however, were not the soft caring eyes of Remus Lupin, but the cold eyes of-  
"Potter!" snapped Severus, taking an involuntary step backwards "What do _you_ want?"  
"To talk, Snape. About Remus, actually. Strange don't you think, that you assumed it would be he waiting outside your," James looked around and smirked "_quaint_ living quarters. Like the decoration. Damp. Very fitting for slime like you."  
Snape clenched his fist tightly around his wand.  
"When you're done with your _pathetic_ insults _Potter_, perhaps you would care to explain why exactly you wish to waste my time. It sickens me to look at you."  
"Merlin help you if you ever encounter a mirror then," retorted James, "You'd probably die of fright. Not that I'd complain."  
The two teenagers' stood glairing at each other for a few minutes, both pairs of eyes clearly reflecting the hatred and loathing each had for the boy facing them.  
James was the first to speak.  
"I want you to break up with Remus. He has got it into his head that you actually care about him, and it stops. Now. I know you are using him to get to me and Sirius. Well, it won't work. Break. It. _Off!_"  
At the last word, James clenched his fists and stepped towards Snape. Snape in return took a step towards James.  
"I have no idea what you are talking about _Potter_, but let me assure you, I want _nothing_ to do with your pet _werewolf_." Snape snarled. "Or do you not remember how it helped you almost kill me?"  
"That didn't stop you snogging him a few days ago." James put on a shrill voice, "'_oh Remus, I hate your friends Remus, they don't really like you Remus,_ _You can't even tell them you're gay! Remus, you're not supposed to be scared of your friends. And friends don't try to kill your boyfriend. You should leave them Remus.'" _James stopped. "That's what you're doing isn't it? You're trying to turn Remus against us." He glared at Snape. "It won't work. Remus has been doing a bit of deception too. He has been reporting back to us you know. We know everything that's happened between you. Every. Little. Detail."  
Snape went slightly paler then usual, and seemed to choke.  
"I... you... what do you mean?" He demanded  
James sneered.  
"You know exactly what I mean Snivellus. Keep away from Lupin, or Sirius and I might have to _help_ him forget about you. Or you about him."  
Snape turned paler still.  
"You... you can't. You wouldn't! Not to Remus! You can't curse him! You're no better then a Death-eater yourself Potter! You think you're so big just because you play Quidditch. Well you're _not._ Even the Gryffindors think you're a prick! Even Lily despises you!"  
It was petty, and Severus knew it, but it seemed to have an effect anyway.  
"YOU LEAVE EVANS OUT OF THIS!" roared James "This isn't about her, you great slimy git, this is about Remus!"  
Snape managed to sneer.  
"What? Jealous because he likes me too Potter? Want to fuck him as well as Evens? Tell me _Potter_, why is it you want every thing I all ready have?"  
James seemed to be fighting not to grab his wand and blast Snape right there. His face turned red, then purple, and then finally white again. He smiled smugly.  
"You can do what you want Snape, but I wasn't going to use an illegal curse on Remus. Maybe on you, but not on him."  
"What ever you do won't be enough" Snape hissed. "He will _never_ leave me. It will just make him realise what I have known for years," he stepped closer to James, "you, James Potter are an arrogant, jealous bastard!"  
James smiled again.  
"You misheard me again Snape, you great prick. I said I wouldn't curse Remus. Why would I? He was in on the whole thing." His lip curled into a grimace, not unlike Snape's. "Didn't you realise Snape? Do you really think that someone like Remus Lupin would ever really want to be with an ugly, greasy Death-eater like you?  
Snape stood, stunned.   
"Piss off Potter. Go wank over that Mudblood Evens." He finally said turning away.  
James pulled his wand out, but Snape, for once, was faster, casting a Jelly Legs Jinx over his shoulder. He didn't even turn to watch the effect it had on his adversary. He wasn't in the mood anymore. Because although he told himself that he didn't actually believe Potter, there was a thought niggling about at the back of his mind. What if it was all true? What if Reemy really was just using him for Potter and Blacks amusement? "Don't be stupid, Severus." He told himself. "Remus wouldn't do a thing like that. Not to anyone. You know him better then that!"  
_But, _said a little negative voice from the back of his mind, _but what if that was part of the act? If he was acting, then you don't know him at all_.  
"Shut up." He thought crossly "Remus just wouldn't do that"

Would he?

****

_Hoped you enjoyed it, please review! =)  
Thank you so much to all of you who have done ~3_


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